Day 12 on Cipralex

  I've been on Cipralex for about 12 days now for my panic disorder and depression, and I can say it has been the opposite of easy. I was terrified to start up on pills again. I'm on 0.5 mg, obviously a very low dose as you have to cut the pills in half. I take them every morning opposed to at night, which would've probably been better since I am tired all the time on them. A lot of the days were terrible. When I first I didn't feel very much; I was foggy headed and out of it which is normal when starting SSRIs. My jaw and teeth hurt at the beginning from clenching my teeth, which happened when I was on Prozac as well.
   After a few days I started getting dizzy spells, chills, along with lots of nausea, I even puked once. My anxiety and depression seemed to get worse. The side effects have also given me more triggers for panic, and I had a major panic attack (I haven't had one so bad in a while) and had to take an Ativan to calm down. This took me a day to get over and I felt very discouraged. I took a day off school and dance, as many people take days off when starting new anti-depressants.I had no motivation to leave my house and felt very depressed like I would never get out of this dark hole, and debated stopping the pills all together. I know it is normal to have these thoughts and for things to get worse before they get better on these pills.
   Now on day 12 things have been getting slightly better. I've been taking non-drowsy ginger Gravol for the nausea and I am trying to stay positive but it's pretty hard to do. I've felt kind of panicky today, but not as depressed I just need to get through this next little bit until I will start seeing some positive results. The pharmacist said it may take 2-12 weeks to work.
     I figure these few weeks of side effects will be worth it to live without panic and depression.

comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable

Its November.It's freezing out.I found my sketch book. 

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In September I saw Ed Sheeran for the second time live and it was amaazzzzzzzzing. Passenger was there too and his music is beautiful as well. I can't wait to see Ed preform again, its amazing. Here are some snaps I took from it!

What might have been lost don't bother me

One of my outfits I wore to dinner while I was on vacay with one of my best pals that I just decided to photograph. Mind the background and disney channel on tv. I'm obsessed with this tank from brandy. I can wear it with just plain jean shorts, or dress it up a little and go out for dinner. My skirt looks shorter than it was in reality by the way hahaha!

Whats in my everyday makeup bag?

Heres a look in to my everyday makeup bag (from H&M) which includes my fav products :

- Urban Decay mini primer potion

- Eyelash curler

- Bedazzled tweezers 

- Pink Sugar Sensual mini

- Soft kohl black pencil liner

- Line Stiletto black liquid liner

- Rimmel Volume Flash Mousse mascara

- Maybelline Turbo Boost mascara

- Rimmel Stay Matte foundation

- Makeup Forever concealer 

- MAC mineral powder

- Tarte Smooth Operator translucent powder

- Kabuki brush

- Vitaminschtick 

Put the sunshine in your mind ☼

A little photo montage of my weekend on the lake.. it was too nice to be at a cottage for a change ahhhhhh 

 

Haulin'

Oh blogging i've missed you!! My computer has being going whack this month with viruses and wasn't working at all. I finally got it to work yayyyyy! Anyways heres a haul of some of the clothes I've bought this summer.

The first two are from H&M and the rest I ordered from Brandy Melville